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Financial Fundamentals

5 Money Questions You Should Ask Your Partner

β€” Alexandra Ardelean

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When you're in a relationship, it's crucial to be on the same page financially. Whether you're dating, engaged, or married, understanding each other's financial values and aspirations can lay the groundwork for a secure future together. In this video, I'll outline five essential money questions to discuss with your partner. By having candid conversations about finances, you can ensure that you and your partner are in sync on your financial path.

Importance of Financial Alignment in Relationships

Being on the same page financially with your partner is crucial for a healthy relationship. It helps to avoid misunderstandings and conflicts in the future. It also helps to set common goals and work towards them together.

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Questions for Dating Relationships

If you're in a dating relationship, it's important to start discussing money after a few months of dating. While you don't need to dive into every detail of your finances right away, having general conversations about money can help you understand each other's financial values and goals. Here are five questions to consider asking your partner:

Timing of Financial Discussions in Dating

It's important to note that these questions are meant to be asked after a few months of dating when you feel comfortable having more serious conversations about your future together.

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What are your thoughts on debt? Do you have any? How do you approach managing it?

It's important to understand how your partner views debt and their approach to managing it. While having debt isn't necessarily a deal-breaker, it's essential to know if they have a plan for paying it off and if they are actively working towards becoming debt-free.

Question 2: Financial Goals

What are your financial goals? Are you actively working towards them?

Understanding your partner's financial goals can help you see if they have a clear vision for their future. Whether they want to buy a home, start a business, or save for retirement, knowing their aspirations can help you see if they are financially responsible and proactive in achieving their goals.

Question 3: Investment Habits

Are you investing? What's your take on financial risk?

Knowing if your partner is investing and how they view financial risk can give you insight into their long-term financial mindset. Whether they are conservative or more aggressive with their investments, understanding their approach can help you see if they are financially savvy and forward-thinking.

Question 4: Housing Situation

Do you rent or own your home? How might this impact our future plans together?

Understanding your partner's housing situation can give you insight into their current living arrangements and how it might impact any future plans you have together. Whether they rent an apartment or own a house, knowing this information can help you see if they are stable and responsible with their living situation.

Question 5: Income

How do you feel about sharing your income details? I'd like to get a better sense of your financial situation.

While discussing income can be sensitive, especially early in a relationship, it's essential to have open communication about each other's financial situations. You don't need to share exact numbers right away, but having general conversations about income can help you understand each other's financial standing.

I remember when I was dating my husband, we had some interesting conversations about credit cards. He was very against using them, while I was all for them! We also discussed our future plansβ€”where we wanted to live, the type of house we desired, and so on. It was beneficial for both of us to understand each other's perspectives, enabling us to make joint decisions that suited us both.

Questions for Married or Engaged Couples

If you're already married or engaged, these questions are tailored specifically for more serious relationships where combining finances and making long-term plans together is more relevant.

Introduction to Questions for Married/Engaged Couples

If you're already married or engaged, these questions are tailored specifically for more serious relationships where combining finances and making long-term plans together is more relevant.

Question 1: Habits Around Giving

What role does giving play in our lives? How do we want to incorporate generosity into our financial strategy?

Understanding each other's habits around giving can help align your values when it comes to being generous with others. Whether it's through charitable donations or supporting family members, knowing how each of you views giving can help create a shared vision for incorporating generosity into your financial strategy.

Question 2: Combining Finances

If our finances aren't already combined, what hesitations do we have about doing so? What would need to change for us to feel comfortable merging our accounts?

For couples who haven't yet combined their finances, discussing any hesitations or concerns is crucial. Whether it's due to differing spending habits or past experiences with money, understanding why one or both partners may be hesitant can help address any underlying issues and work towards finding common ground.

Question 3: Money Tendencies Affecting Spending

How do our tendencies around money affect our spending habits? For example, am I more of a spender, while my partner is more of a saver? What motivates these tendencies?

Understanding each other's tendencies around money - whether one person is more of a spender while the other is more of a saver - can help identify potential areas of conflict when it comes to spending habits. By understanding the motivations behind those tendencies (e.g., upbringing, personal values), couples can find ways to balance each other out and create healthy spending habits as a team.

Question 4: Feelings Around Budgeting

How do we feel about budgeting as a couple? What methods have worked well for us in the past?

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Question 5: Long-Term Financial Goals

What are our long-term financial goals as a couple? This could include retirement planning, travel aspirations, housing dreams (buying vs renting), education savings (for children), etc.

Establishing shared long-term financial goals is crucial for couples who are building a life together. Whether it's saving for retirement, planning for travel adventures, deciding between buying or renting a home, or setting aside funds for children's education, having clarity on these goals can help guide your financial decisions as a team.

I recommend using the Every Dollar app, which is great because it allows two people access, so both partners can see what's going on with the budget at all times!

Conclusion and Practical Advice

Having open and honest conversations about money with your significant other is crucial for building a strong foundation in your relationship. By asking these five questions - whether you're in the early stages of dating or already married/engaged - you can gain valuable insights into each other's financial values and goals. This will help ensure that you're aligned in your journey towards building a secure and prosperous future together.

I hope this video has been helpful! If so, please share it with your significant other so that they can also benefit from these questions! Let me know what else would be helpful when discussing money with someone else!